Monday, September 1, 2008

Groan-ups. The Dad Jokes

I got this idea for a post from Reader's Digest. Yes, yes, I give them the credit. It's about Dad Jokes. All of us children would be familiar with them. First the joke is cracked. Mom smiles appreciatively. My sis and I raise my eyebrows questioningly asking whether that was a joke. Mom shoots a glare. It obviously worked, as sis and I laugh out loud in typical LOL style. They are the Dad Jokes. Maybe I'm doing a sad job explaining them. I'll show you some examples. My sis and I started noting down (Literally noting down. Though in our generation, literally 'typing' them down on the cell phone, so that we remember all of them. This blog post was plotted since some 2-3 months. Muhuhahaha.)

1) The family went to Allen Solly for shopping for formal clothes for my sister before she left abroad. Dad looks at Allen Solly's board outside the shop and turns to me and Lavs.
"If Allen Solly doesn't have the clothes we want, what will they say?"
He knows we both are dumb, so he won't wait for an answer.
He shows his 100 watt smile. "Solly, we don't have it."
Lavs and I manage a warm, fake smile while mom laughs dutifully.

2) Whenever I see Dhoni, Dravid, Zaheer's pics on billboards, outside Reebok showroom, or Sonata showroom or whatever, I announce "Dhoniiiii" or "Draviiiiiiid" joyfully.
So, I see Dhoni's photo endorsing Sonata watches on the back of a bus. Dad, Lavs and I were in the car behind the bus. I squealled "Dhoniiiii" as usual. My sis remained indifferent. Dad stares at MSD smiling casually back at him. I shrank back into the back seat, expecting a Dad joke coming.
The wisecrack- "Dhoni used to hang out of the buses when he was young. And he still hangs out of the buses when he's famous."

3) I entertain Dad by telling him about the smokers, drinkers, dopers of my batch, plus the girly bitching that happens, plus some of the spicy news about the hostels. In short, I tell my parents and sister about every single damn thing that happens in my college, specially my batch, lol. (My batch will hate me, after reading this) So, I was telling Dad about a smoker who's roomie is a non-smoker. So the non smoker was cribbing to some of us about his smoker roomie.
Dad's eyes light up. Shit, I realized the volcano was going to burst. I continued babbling on with the story, but Alas, Dad was too quick. He interrupted me.
"The non smoker didn't smoke, so he fumed"

4) My sister was waiting for her i-20 (an all important document which comes from colleges abroad, as proof that you've got admission there) So one fine day, she was going with Dad for some document work. My sis, jobless as usual, thoughtfully asks Dad, "Why is i-20 called i-20?"
Dad's eyes glint evilly. My sis, the topper, the gold medalist, the girl who robs all the certificates of intelligence, had invited a Dad Joke.
"Because of the T-20 format."
Hahahahaha, he roars loudly.

5) I was talking about my college friend Joyeeta. Well, she was short on cash, so I had lent her some money. I don't know why, but somehow, that topic came up and I chattered on about Joyeeta being broke during exam time. All of us are always broke during exam time, weird it was. I continued giving a speech on Joyeeta. I mentioned about her mom working in State Bank of India. Dad clears his throat.
I didn't bother to freak out. I was immune to the jokes, I guess.
"Her mom works in a bank, that's why she's in debt."

Now, you know where my (??)sense of humour(??) comes from....Oh, let me start taking down some of those Mom Jokes too.....

12 comments:

peter said...

ohh so Pj's are in ur genes ...thank god now I knw the energy behind The Brangilina crap u ver producing :)

solly wala and i-20 jokes were really funny ....even my dad soes so many f 'em ...:)

happy blogging !

Mads said...

hey u contributed in the brangilina crap too ok, don't blame me for everything...

:O Pj's are not in my genes...i wear jeans and pajamas separately :D :D :D :D :D :D :)

Lavanya said...

ooooooohhhhh u finally wrote this blog ! :) :) very nice meeyelk!! couldnt stop laughing...seriously..

but u missd ''vikram n betaal''
hahahaha
eehehe
luuuuuuuuuv u! :)

alex paul k said...

seriously poor jokes....
good compilation neways
but i ve serious doubts ovr yo dads contribution.....usually gals crack such stuff n laugh(at themselves)

Mads said...

@lavs :-) love u too...
yeah i missed out vikram betal :(
@alex :-| that was a PJ now...

Prabhu Dutta Das said...

Grrr...
I was welcomed to the posts with the disclaimer "PPJS"

But you had none in the comments sectionz:- "You are sued for it" For wearing your jeans and pyajamas separately :D

Nidhi said...

Your dad is really funny/. i dont y u named it grown up joke.. i laughed at his Solly joke. ah i wish my dad would pass such smart comment too. Dhoni thing too was hilarious.
After reading this >>> "The non smoker didn't smoke, so he fumed" I FELT I NEED TO MEET UR DAD. SMART COMMENT :)
Your dad should write a joke book.
P.s don’t get angry on me .. But i really found the grown up - the dad jokes funny.

Mads said...

hehe nidhi...thanks a lot for ur comment..i'll surely show this to my dad :-) im sure ur dad also cracks such jokes. it's in the genes of every dad ;-) im not angry with u!! :-) thanks again for ur comments...

Nidhi said...

You are most welcome dear. I have blogrolled u too :)

RiverSoul said...

And boy! Was Nidhi right!

They already called the mental hospital's ambulance service! Ok. Now i gotta go
Gotta convince them that i'm still sane
:D
Maybe i'll make them read your post!
:D

Mads said...

Dhuuu Mangal made u read my post :"> So sweet of her :D

Yes yes show the post. i dont know if u have internet in mental hospital. how will update ur blog and read mine from there,huh huh? :P
thanks a lot for commenting :-)

Anonymous said...

Who knows where to download XRumer 5.0 Palladium?
Help, please. All recommend this program to effectively advertise on the Internet, this is the best program!