Tuesday, June 24, 2008

I'm Bored.

From Christopher's blog. http://www.crissdude.blogspot.com/ (Thank me for publicizing your blog)
1. Grab the book nearest to you, turn on a random page and find random line.
The rope began to hit the butcher, the butcher began to kill the cow,
Oh. Can I use the rope to hit other people ?

2. Stretch your left arm out as far as you can
Ouch, that hurts. I came back from a stiff train journey today and I'm tired.

3. What is the last thing you watched on TV?
Some shit on CNN-IBN this morning. Dad was watching it.

4. Without looking, guess what time it is?
12 something ?

5. Now look at the clock, what is the actual time?
11:41 am (Hah, I was close)

6. With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?
Some tak tak noise in my cupboard. I wonder what it is. Hopefully not a lizard or something.

7. Before you started this survey, what did you look at?
Ballack's pics, Christopher's blog(ahem! That's why this post is here) and my orkut scrapbook.

9. What are you wearing?
Red shirt, red skirt

10. Did you dream last night?
Some shit of my sis and sending her off to America, and I was in Mumbai. I dreamt it because I was in Mumbai, and we were there for the visa for my sis !!!

11.When did you last laugh?
Before 5 mins with my sister about the half naked man in my train.

12. What is on the walls of the room you are in?
Boring white walls and a animals+forest painting and a Team India's 20-20 winning team's poster from Outlook magazine.

13. What do u think of this quiz?
I enjoy quizes which save me from my usual boredom.

14. Which was the last film u saw?
Woodstock Villa lol. Sikander is Hot.

15.If you became a multimillionaire overnight, what would you buy?
A house in Mumbai, a law degree, my own law firm, and a publishing house and lots of other things for my parents, sis, grandparents blah blah.

16. Tell me something about you that I dunno.
I want to write a novel some day.

17. If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?
Remove that shit called global warming.

18. Do you like to dance?
Not really.

19. George Bush
Eh ?

20. Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him?
Aryan?

21. Would you ever consider living abroad?
No way. India rocks, totally.

22.What do you want GOD to say to you when you reach the pearly gates?
"Hey, you did a decent job down there."

23. People who may do this memo in their journal.
I wouldn't know about it. Since people read my blog, and don't bother to comment. They might as well, take this away in their journal and not even inform me about it. Ahh, who cares anyway.

My train journey to Mumbai and then, the home coming....

So there I was going by Lokshakti Express with my dad and sis to Mumbai for my sister's visa interview. We usually fly to Mumbai but this time it was going to be a train journey. I was kinda cool with the idea because I was bored of flying. (I sound like a bird, don't I?) We got into our compartment and first scanned our neighbours. A good looking girl, and her parents were sitting and staring at us. The girl and her mom kept reading the t-shirt quote on my sister's t-shirt (I'm not evil, I'm just up to no good) My sis and I ignored them and scanned the floor. No cockroaches, no lizards. Only some dirty tea spilt under the seat in front of us. And that familiar train stink surrounding us. Dad grew uneasy seeing my sis and I whispering furiously to each other. Before we could conspire anything, he packed us off to sleep. I was on the top berth with my sister under me (hahaha. Ok, alright, that was not funny) I stared at the ceiling. My sis was busy messaging. My cell's battery was low as usual. I messaged a little and then had to stop. I smiled slightly at the good looking girl who was lying down on the other top berth. She smiled back and started fiddling with her V3i phone. She played 'Pehli nazar mein'. I gratefully blessed her for giving me those 3 minutes of entertainment. And she played it for the second time. Cool, I thought. And she played it for the third time. Errrr. Maybe V3i was stuck on that song. Finally the song changed to "Lambi Judai" from Jannat. Yay!! And then her dad's head shot up from the lower berth and ordered her to switch the phone off. V3i was switched off and she drifted off to sleep. Sigh. I could not sleep thinking of the Italy v. Spain quarter finals. Dad's snores kept me company. Morning was sad. I was sleepy. V3i girl's eyes were small and swollen. I jumped down from the top berth which was my 1st mistake of the train journey. I broke my 19 year old record of not stepping on to the train floor. My dad and sis smirked at me. "You broke it even before me" I grumbled to my sis.
Finally, we were rolling off in an auto to Chembur. When Mom messaged that Spain had won 4-2 on penalties. I was devastated.

The trip- Mumbai was awesome as ever. Rained a little. Had makkai and Gupta Bhel. Travelled from Vashi to Khargar to God knows where else. Tiring but worth it. And yeah, Kiran Kher had supposedly come, on my sister's visa date, to get her visa. Lol.

And there I was, coming back by Gujarat Mail with my sis and dad. Sis got the visa and after enduring all the emotional speeches by our relatives, she was tired. The emotional speeches included some quotes like, (And supposedly the speeches applied to me too, since I was in a hostel) :- Your parents have trusted you and earned money through their hard work to send you so far. Use it with care and work hard. (I guiltily thought of all those movie and dinner treats I went for so occassionally) And when my sis is tired, she's angry. That was my cue to buzz off far, far, far from her. Dad was tired too. Only one of my co-passengers in the compartment was present. A gujju girl was travelling alone. Her uncle and aunt shot me and sis a dirty, injured look whenever we even looked at their niece. The girl bent down to take her uncle and aunt's blessings. My sis and I hoped she didn't touch the train floor while touching their feet. Rest of the seats were empty. Dad threw a hint that he wanted to sleep, so sis and I scampered off. I was on the top berth, she was under me again. Sis and dad dozed off happily and I resumed staring at the ceiling. No cockroaches, no lizards again, we were in luck. The train, this time was full of the college going crowd. So I had a merry time seeing guys and gals running from one compartment to another. There was a half naked fat man (don't imagine, it will be injurious to your imagination) and my sis and I made up dirty gujju words for him. We looked at him like the surprised smiley. Along with him were 2 guys. One guy was lecturing the others with a huge smile. Apparently, New Zealand was a better place to study in than Australia. I imagined my sis in a dilemma of choosing between Daniel Vettori and Mitchell Johnson. The gujju girl ran off to the top berth in the side thingys. (My language is ghatti, bear with it) She was glued to "The 3 mistakes of my life". Dad sleepily asked her if she wanted the lights off which she declined. She soon closed the book and looked at 3 of us. My sis and I communicated through telepathy (We later confirmed that we both got each other's message, I'm not kidding) and we pretended to sleep. We were right, she wanted us to switch the lights off. She grumpily came and switched it off. The sadist in me awoke as I shot up from bed and looked at her. I didnt note her reaction. At around 2 something, 3 guys came. Made hell lot of noise. They could not reach out for the bedsheets kept up (I DO NOT have the patience to think of what that rod thing is called, so never mind) so I gave it. They were startled to see a hand emerge from the blanket and hand over the bedsheets. My head emerged then to show them I was irritated and awake.(which btw is the worst combination you can find Madhuri in the middle of the night) Dad was too tired to snore, I think. 2 outta the 3 newbies had started snoring. Snoring weirdly too. There was no repetition in the snores that we usually get to hear. It was musically weird.
Cutting the crap, the night was sad. Then came morning. I didn't have the energy or time to glare at the snorers because it was time to go home. To Mom. And to India v. Hong Kong (1st match of Asia Cup, aren't you excited?)

Sunday, June 15, 2008

Why men are rude pigs

(I'm rather fond of writing in points, so here it goes again...)
1) "Hey I got a new dress today!" she says with a huge smile. She waits for him to ask her to wear it and show him. But he simply says, "So??"
2)"You want to watch this shit all night??" she says with a laugh, pointing at a football match going on. "Yes. Good night." is his blunt answer. With no apologies.
3)When she gets excited about his birthday. His cold answer is "I don't celebrate my birthday. It's just another day."
4)And of course, when it's her birthday. He conveniently forgets it. Or even if he remembers it, he smugly says, "It's just another day." Yeah right.
5)"You don't know anything." End of story.
6)"You emotional creatures." he says and rolls his eyes. Duh. At least one among the two of us needs to have emotions.
7)After a fight, he'll throw hints when he wants to make up. But that blunt "sorry" will never come out.
8)He can lift her. But she can't lift him. Huh. Whatever that was supposed to mean.
9)Need I mention belching, cracking non veg jokes in front of a girl they hardly know, scratching themselves at inappropriate places in public? Phew. Disgusting.
10)Telling every Rita,Sita,Gita their autobiography. And expecting the poor girl to remember everything in detail.

To be continued, when the next guy launches his rude attack on me or any one I know.
That's why men are rude pigs. It's great being a girl. At least it's better than the other option.

Monday, June 9, 2008

Why I will not/do not want to become a lawyer.

This post does not imply any defamation or mockery at anyone. It's my personal opinion. (This is one of the reasons why I do not want to become a lawyer. I have already started footnoting my own words, dammit.)

I woke up one fine morning and walked up to my mom. I announced, "I want to do law."


My mom smiled her usual encouraging smile. I had woken up many mornings and announced many a times that I'm going to become an artist, join the army, become a pilot, a linguist expert (!!!!) , a journalist. And finally I decided. I wanted to become a lawyer.

I started reading about politics. I realized the newspaper contained more than the sports page. And I fell in love with the newspaper.


It all happened all of a sudden. I got through to a National Law University. I was on my way to become a lawyer.


But 2 years later. I realized I was not moving on. Maybe I was not going to become a lawyer, after all. Here's why...

1) My c.g.p.a sucks, and the irony is that the c.g.p.a matters a lot in your career.

2) I like law. Don't love it. Don't see myself as a lawyer. Get me ? Don't bother if you didn't.

3) I spend half my life writing stories and poems or reading about some damn cricketter's some damn half century of 20 balls. And put my research for the latest legal essay writing competition aside. This is why I don't win those competitions. I know it. And I still don't improve.

4) Cricket has led to me ruining my academic life. I know it. And I still don't learn. Team India rocks.

5) Damn the day I read Perry Mason and John Grisham and imagined I'll be a lawyer. Either I was too foolish or too confident in judging my abilities.

6) The big money does NOT excite/inspire/motivate me into becoming a lawyer. I'm being honest.

7) It's lawyer. Not a liar. Ha-ha. I'm bored of that joke even before I become one.

8) I used to love hanging out with friends, sleeping. Law school has turned me into a sick and twisted being. Whenever my friends tease me, I threaten legal action based on things that they've never heard about or understand. I smirk wisely at the irritated, confused and worried look on their face. DUH. What will become of me if I become a lawyer? *scowls*

9) Law school drama has made me a psychologist. Yes, you love him. Yes, he loves you. But why do you drag me into it?! And I thought I came here to become a lawyer.

The list should continue, but the authoress has slipped into the ultimate depression mode. It is wise to discontinue it.
Again, I do not intend to defame anyone. Or defame law school for the matter. It's actually really a wise option. You work hard, you get it. I didn't, I haven't got it.YET. There's still time and hope for me. I guess.

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

Why we cricket fanatics aren't nice people.

Amazing what cricket can do to a person. Specially in India. IPL has turned me into a evil witch who takes sadistic pleasure in abusing Indians. Flashback. The final between Rajasthan Royals and Chennai Super Kings. No prizes for guessing who the super queen was supporting. I laughed like a maniac when poor Kaif and Akmal dashed into each other while taking a catch. "Injured injured, walk off walk off" I yelled. My mom shot me a dirty look and said, "He's Indian. Don't say that." I looked wildly and screamed, "But..." But actually, I couldn't argue. She was right. I changed my sentence to, "Akmal, Paki, injured injured, yaar please." My mom simply rolled her eyes. Later that night, I reminded myself how I loved Kaif when he won us the Natwest Finals 2001. How Akmal persistently bugged us with his irritating, valuable knocks in that Test Match.
Was it me who wanted to kill them off just some hours back?

Next. Mumbai v. Kings XI Punjab. Yuvi had said Mumbai crowd had forgotten that other teams play for India. I shouted, "You fool, this is not about India." I was on the stony Mumbai crowd's side which refused to support Yuvi henceforth in the tournament. I was in front of the tv booing merrily as I watched the Wankhede stadium boo Yuvraj when Kings XI lost to Chennai in the semi finals. Duh. Since when did I start hating Yuvraj ?

Not only IPL. When India toured Australia sometime, I had hoped for Jane Mcgrath's condition to worsen so that Glenn Mcgrath would retire and sit with her. I'll never forget the way mom looked at me then. I took it back but it was too late. Mcgrath's retired. Thanks to my bigmouth.

I'm learning it the hard way. I force myself to watch Pakistan beating India. It's not easily learning sportswomanspirit.