Wednesday, October 28, 2009

That Environ-MENTAL law paper !!

No, no, I didn’t pass away after falling down from an escalator or something. It’s been long since I posted, but here I am….

4 exams down, and 2 more to go. Screwed up 2 exams, and 2 were decent, in case you care. Had Environmental Law exam today. It’s been 7 semesters since me and Harini are giving exams and it’s always been the same story. In 3rd semester, before a criminal law paper, from 11 pm to 7 am we chatted about Shahid-Kareena’s breakup. In 4th semester, we had an exclusive men bashing session, with an email forward I received called '99 things you need to know about men’ for reference.

But we outdid ourselves today. Who discusses about ants 15 minutes before the exam? A 60 marks paper, with at least a dozen Acts to remember, a zillion cases to remember. And we are laughing before the paper when the guys who are always out of the class and the chilled out ones were studying seriously as if its doomsday.

Segment 1:
So we were studying in Harini’s room and I casually flicked an ant off the wall. This is when it all started. Harini looks at the ant with pity and says, “What a life it has. No exams. No boy to irritate her. No tension at all”. (Yup, we assumed it’s a female because it’s a girls hostel I guess)
Me: “But poor thing, she climbed all the way up the wall and I just flicked her off. How many times does she climb up like this on her thin legs?”
Thus, we discussed the pros and cons of being an ant.

Segment 2:

Harini: “The course is never ending!! You know Ravana?”
Me: giving wtf look to her.
Harini: “Oh of course, you know Ravana.
Me: wtf look continues.
Harini: So when Ram killed Ravana, they went back to Ayodhya naa?
Me: wtf look continues since I’m clueless as to where this is heading to. From Wildlife Protection Act to Ravana?
Harini: So they went on this vahana where one seat would increase despite the number of people who climbed on the vahana.
Me: Uhuh…
Harini: (beaming with joy) So our course is like the vahana !! Keeps increasing like that one seat !!
Me: rofl for the next 20 minutes.

Segment 3:

Scene: Outside our respective classrooms, 15 minutes before the exam. Harini had her bunch of 4 months worth of xeroxed notes in her arms and I was trying to balance my bunch of notes.
Harini suddenly looks on the wall and puts her fingers and imitates an ant walking on that wall. We discussed during those 15 minutes whatever we had discussed the night before and shamelessly laughed at the fact that we were discussing the stupid discussion again.

We came out of the exam, beaming, not because the exam was over.
Harini: So, how was it?
Me: Ahh….
Harini: Yeah, same. Anyway, I have thought of the perfect dress I’m going to buy for my sister’s wedding.
(Notice the conversation regarding the exam doesn’t last for more than 10 seconds)
Me: When is it? It’s not until next year end, right?
Harini: Yeah…
Me: Let’s shop for bags when we intern this time, ok?
And we don't bother discussing the paper or thinking bout the next paper at all.

Is it the drastic effect of 7 semesters and 40 end semester examinations that we have undergone which has made us like this?

P.s- Would you believe me if I said that the paper actually was decent for both of us?

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Escalaphobia che.

Normal people have phobias for lizards (there, you shivered when you read the word itself !!) or spiders (that small thing??) or heights (and here I'm scared I won't get a tall guy :P)

But I have to be different from the rest of the world.
I suffer from this phobia called Escalaphobia. The fear of escalators.

Why? Why? Why do they exist? Man built stairs, man built elevators. but the jerk wasn't satisfied and he made the you-know-whats too.

Here's a dedication to the E things.

You are ugly, you are cunning, a big cheat,
Your teeth, they wanna bite,
And snap off, when I step my feet,
You claim you fly as fast as a kite.

You make me unsteady,
You make my heart stop beating,
You laugh like a maniac, bloody,
And keep the pace jumping.

People appreciate you for saving their time,
They do not understand the terror I undergo,
You save their energy, when they are past their prime,
You have made my life in malls a big blow.

The liftmen laugh at me when I stand before,
Shivering, knees giving way, I tremble,
You mean escalator, you laugh, you ridicule, you roar,
As I make my way to the elevator or stairs, all humble.

My other phobia is Cynophobia i.e. fear of dogs. But I can still manage by shivering, abusing and walking past the poor dog, which incidentally, only bites when it is moody because of which the bitten has to receive only 14 injections. For clarifications, I have not been bitten (YET! Touch wood)