Tuesday, June 23, 2009

The Lawyer's Trial

My sis came back to India a few months back and she's going to go back tomorrow. So but naturally, she is cribbing and looks upset whenever she sees a cow or dog or a man peeing on the road with a sappy 'I-will-miss-you-when-i-am-back-in-that-horrible-place' look on her face.

We have been entertaining guests, almost on daily basis, who come and ask advice on how to live there, pee there, etc. etc. But naturally, yours truly, the innocent victim, is attacked too with questions like,

(Questions are in Gujarati/Hindi but I'm writing them down in English)
1) "What's our small one doing?" (And they themselves are 3-4 inches shorter than me!)

2) "Law???!!!" (Followed by ten shocked smileys flashing across the room and me grinning sheepishly and my mom giving a fake, sappy grin at me)

3) "Why did she take law??" (with a high laugh) "She didn't get admission in medical or engineering, huh?"

Okay. Now. Law is not prostitution that I've been forced into, like on the lines of Lagaa Chunari Mei Daag (Whatever the spelling is). Medicine and Engineering does NOT interest me. That's why I took Arts. Commerce is stupid, even though Maths is pretty much interesting.

P.S to the world- There exist other careers too except engineering and medicine for students.

Also, I cleared a freaking entrance exam for which I didn't even half as much prepare as my other college dudes and dudenis have prepared. But I still got through. (shrugs)

It's a different fact that my grades suck. But hello? Einstein's grades sucked. Mine are worse!! (Yes, this quote is copied shamelessly from a Calvin and Hobbes book)

4) They just don't give up.
"Wants to earn fast money, huh?" is their declaration, with a smirk.
Okay, it's not my fault that lawyers never go into recession. I curse this world of man-un-kind to submerge deeply into recession, that they cry and beg on the streets and...muhuhaahaha. Come to me, said the lawyer to the recessionized.

5) "So she is the first lawyer in the family?" (a slight frown on their face. Things weren't exactly going according to their plan to insult,taunt and demoralize me and make my family feel they should have thrown me in the nearest orphanage when I was born)

Yes Aunty. Yes Uncle. My cousin studied law, but he isn't practising now. So I don't have a Godfather or Godmother or Godchacha, Godchachi, except the one who is hiding in heavens and giving me a thumbs up all the time. So it's upto me to make the Iyer mark on the big bad world of Law (with an earnest, sincere look)

6) "She'll easily get a job." they sorrowfully confess as they realize lawyers are always in demand and picturize me charging them per word I speak :D
I smirk in reply and leave the room holding my head high, as the mere mortals have no choice, but to look on....

7) After I leave the room,
"Lawyer...or Liar??" (with a general snigger in the room)
Trust me, when I'm a lawyer, I will sue each and everyone who makes that crack.

68 comments:

peter said...

Arey studying LAW is much more difficult than studying engg..I have seen those thick books, Engg is a cake walk :)

no more talks on recession, it has become boring to talk about it.
Relatives need a reason to tease the youngest ones ,,trust me :P

Aw.S.M said...

sheesh..ur a LAWYER!!..kyun engg college mein admission nahi mila kya :P...

And first lawyer in the family..wah wah..and job offer bhi hain haath mein :P...life s lookin up Jaya Ji :P.

Yeah obv lawyers dont have recession to worry about...u guys urselves r no1 chors na!!

Aur relatives toh suck re :P...hehe

luv
amith

vanilla sky said...

Law is definitely tougher than engg, if not medicine.
My neighbour,who's a lawyer, has the entire 1st floor dedicated to big, fat, black binded books :O
Do you need to have everything at your fingetips? Like clause no 13, article no 256 of indian penal code?
do you have practise classes,wearing those black robes, (though everybody will not end up practising , right?)?
Sorry for the stupid questions.

Harshita said...

1. Small one aur woh bhi tu...?? hehe... Eye test gift kar dey unhey...hehe

2. Haww... I thought they fall off their chairs... :D

3. Ah! the usual sawaal...hehehe... Engineering nahi toh law sahi... wah wah kya funda che... ;)

hehe... laaga chunari mein daag is the song on my blog... kya baat...

Yups.. my cousin bhai log are also taking up law and I told them abt u... and how you and Chitwan are passionate abt it...way to go gal...

Kudiye!! (for clearing the entrance)... :D :D

4. Kudos to this pointer... ;)

5. kya rey! u shud throw them instead in a shady orphanage... tell them am the first and am gonna be the best...wink wink... Pagli Mads- the head-banging lawyer...hehehe

6. Ab aaya ooth pahaad ke neechey!! sahi... keep that chin up...

7. Kisi ko chorna mat... :D :D

Haaye rabba! mainey kitna lamba comment kiya.. par kitna sincerely padaa bhi toh... no matter wat... abhi tu bahut badi lawyer bhi bann gayi.. toh bhi main toh tere ko PAGLI MADS...B something something... LLB he bulaaney waali hun... ;)

Dr. Acula said...

urrrrgghhhh!!! I HATE PEOPLE, RELATIVES, PEOPLE. PEOPLE SUCKKK!!! I mean, okay..this is gonna be long.

I'm doing CA. But, it's been a weird path that I've taken to here. See, I've been an awesome student ALL my life and have got awesome marks in whatever exams. I had Biology in school..like the last two years. Biology, because I'd always liked it and still DO like it! And plus, didn't have a clue as to what exactly I wanted to after class 12th..as is the case with most of us. I even joined the very famous ( I hope Gujrat too is blessed by its presence!) 'Aakash Institute' because they were helping me with school as well and I thought, well, I might as well join it now..and I'll see where it takes me..despite the fact that I was never too keen on medicine. And the way I slogged those two years !!! phew.. I mean, I really am proud of myself. Near the end of those two frikkin years, I decide not to go in for MBBS, RamaDoss's decision to add one more year to the course being one of the reasons..which also included the fact that I'm damn scare of needles, blood, dead bodies (uhh?? :P) et al. And I refused to take the entrance exams.

And what do my relatives have to say on this?? That I'd gotten the jitters and THAT was the reason I didn't take the exams.

Engineering ..I'd never liked the sound of it ..EVER!!!

And so.the general sentiment is that I'm studying Chartered Accountancy all because I couldn't get through a good medicine or engineering college.

And no one will believe that I still DO like Bio..and still DONOT regret my decision to not take up MBBS!!

Never knew people thought the same way about law though. And tell you what, CA and MBBS (law ka pata nai!) are the only two REAL professional courses where you gotta study your asses off. Engineering?? The world is one big vacation for them! Especially the IITians, I tell you!

Phew..that was long. Hehe . Enjoy commenting back! Bechaari!! :P

P.S.: I also did my first year in B.Sc. Mathematics Hons. from Delhi University before finally deciding on CA, btw. :D

Roo-Ba-Roo said...

Law is really good subject..n ppl who say that there is only engeering n medical to study, are wrong..

Its individuals'choice...

Roo-Ba-Roo said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Lancelot said...

I underwent the 1 to 7...whoever ridicules me for taking up law - I make sure after 10 mins they will die in self pity for sticking to a sorrowful profession they are in...and of course the last one makes them think they are smart my reply always will be "The lies saves your ass"...we need to start a welfare movement...

Anurag said...

lol lol lol ....

Yeah I do pity you ..but shud them off...I mean they are bound to make such comments...What else do you want them to say ...Lawyers Rock! ...They are never gonna say that ...And yeah sue them when you do get that degree.... :P :P

nandita! said...

Yeah relatives can be such pain in the ass! They think I took law because I suck at studying and I hate to try! It never matters if i actually like law or not! No for them I am a good for nothing- Not engineer??!! Oh you will find it hard to get a job! CRAP!! Those who give that talk have no sense whatsoever! Because I adore the profession!

Spica said...

Sigh.. tell me about the whole "didn't you get into engg/medicine?" look?! At least you're doing what is considered "professional". Imagine my plight! :-( A B.Sc graduate. In Science! The horror!

Loved the Calvin quote! :-)

Pallav said...

Pleaseee......
please tell them Law is difficult then studying anythng.. n u knw its so tough to clear its entrace..
i wobder why people interfere o much... why dont they mind there own business.. why they keep on nagging...
uffff..
i think i shld stop here itself....

anyways.. i loved it..

Kepp writing
n cheers :)
haan
thanks for the awards..

Pallav

Rajat said...

People know about law atleast! When you are pursuing something that is virtually unknown, you're in worse luck..

I'm doing Applied Physical Sciences from DU. It doesn't ring any bell, I know. That's why ... whenever some relative asks about my studies, I have to explain to the hell about it - kaisa course hai? kya padhaate hain? kaisi job milegi?

You got the point!

Shaunak said...

Ah, the pleasures of Commerce! Got my results and passed happily.
I still get that every time from my school teachers, "Engineering kyon nahi kiya?" LOL.

Btw, Mads, Lawyer ki Liar? =P

Where thoughts are Word$ said...

=) lol

"...make my family feel they should have thrown me in the nearest orphanage when I was born."

This line was..umm...well I've no words to describe this line! :P

Even I've this "relatives phobia"... :D coz whenever they come they scare me by saying "Treat us for free."

They don't know how expensive dentistry proves to the doctors!! :D

Loved this post! :)

Where thoughts are Word$ said...

And ya like someone has already said before me- Engineers ENJOY their life trulyyyyy,party the hardest,watch movies and if they get time from all this,they study at the last minute,which literally means "LAST MINUTE"...usse pehle to life is really paradise for them.Do whatever you want & still clear exams with FLYING COLOURS!!

and then start earning also at the age of
22,when other professionals are struggling hard to get a job/get through post-graduation entrances...

How I hate this!! :(

To be honest,not to offend anyone, BUT engineers FRUSTRATE me!!!! :D

Madhuri,Don't sue me for anything.I'm scared of lawyers,judges & trials. :)

And ya the accused too,who're dragged at the court. :P

Chitwan said...

who knows better than me..i took a U-turn in middle of 12th when i ws gearing to appear in mbbs entrance...and here I am..wearing black coat instead of white!!

yah these ignorant "mortals" cant be convinced..i gave up long time back..so shud you..
good post!!loved it

The Rat... said...

lolzzz... these u get to hear just because u are learning law huh??? just imagine wat i wud have heard given i am a leather technologist.. :-D sheesh... but that was ages ago and now relatives ome to me for a nice leather bag or garment.. they are all praises for me...

just wait till u finish ur course,, they ll wait on their hands n feet :-)

Sarath said...

hehehe...

guess u will make millions sueing them all.. is there any provision in law for suing for calling someone a liar???

Amrita~Ams said...

hhehe...engg is easy re..
btw...whether ur a lawyer or liar..:P
do fight frm my side..i want to put all those ppl in jail who talks abt recession+engg
read as "MANHANI case "...spelling is wrong i guess :P

Aditi..............:) said...

Hey nice title to this post...i loved it...!:)

I'll try 2 be truthful said...

see vanilla sky is irking u like your relatives *killijoy* :P :D

oof mujhe pata hai kya kaha gaya tha ??
stupid old uncle: ooooo u didnt get into medical?? Ohhoo girls should be doctors .

me: ermm uncle I didnt like biology, so never took the med exams.

SOU: aaarrreee tab nurse ban jana tha.


I mean how do you seriously seriously stay off without clawing at them ??


naaah LAW is super tough. dekhna when u become one all these people will come wagging for 'free lawyer advice' ! huh! hypocrites!!


As for being the 'first so&so' in the family-its kinda nice tag.

and this one-->"Wants to earn fast money, huh?" takes the cake.

How can they ask such questions?
wasnt fast money=prostitution/call girl.

sachhi madsy tussi gr8 ho (just for tolerating 'em)

btw newyork kab dekhegi?

vanilla sky said...

na naaa, i'm not irking or anything :(
But there's this general interest of people about every career !

Like docs dread attending parties, lest people pour out their troubles to them!
Like we keep on asking our medical friends , how does it feel dissect a human body and they are really tired answering!

Mads said...

@ Peter.... hehe thanks for rubbing it in :P
naah relatives don't bother me at all..i meant the other freaking part of samaj who do that.... :(
who cares, anyway :P

Mads said...

@ Amith...Lol :D Haan hum hai no.1 chors...and the best part is we bail ourselves out :P
Relatives ki baat nahi hai..my relatives are cool...rather..in my family, we just btw types tell what we are gonna do in our lives, and they are like, oh cool, ur going for the army? ur marrying a japanese? so cool!! :P

Mads said...

@ Vanilla sky...naah im not bugged by your questions. I totally understand. Law is something alag..so naturally the questions would erupt :D
Btw thanks for making me feel ashamed of myself by suddenly asking me about Article 256 of Constitution and i'm busy googling for it, when I should have drilled it in my head, by now :(
Yeah those practice courts are called moot courts...u can wikipedia maarofy for it for extra g.k :D
and yeah we are supposed to remember the articles in Indian Constitution (blushes) and we are supposed to know the important sections in Indian Penal Code..for murder..rape...abetment..etc...but not all...
And we are allowed a bare act (a book which contains all the sections n explanation for those sections for that particular Act) in the courts...
but during exams, sometimes, we are supposed to mug and vomit it all :(
can u ask your neighbour uncle to give me a job? please please please. i'll treat u to a vanilla icecream which will be as high as a sky :D

Pallav said...

hey
u got some Awards
Do check my Post

Pallav

enchantinganki said...

Ask such people to go and get a life...they suck big time.. :-|

Vinnie said...

Mads!
remember me? u once visited me thru Peter's :)

vaise, i can understand ur plight..thats why none of us kids took law - Dad was a lawyer :P

Mads said...

@ Harshita...
1) yes!! :P

2) I wish they had X-(

3) X-( stupid funda :X
accha hua ur bhai log didnt get in. less lawyers are better for the country :| :(
thanks thanks :D
4) thanks again :D :P
5) ROFL @ head banging lawyer :D
6) and 7) hehehe :D :D :D
B kya :O nice nickname de, okay :P
thank uuuuuuuuu >:D< for the lambaest comment ever :D

Mads said...

@ Dr. Acula :O
wah re...And seriously..its your life..later in life when u are successful...no one can say a shit and they wont remember whether u were studying medicine or what :P :D
and yes its true..engineers have the easiest life :'(

Mads said...

@ Roo-ba-roo
wah nice nickname :D
yeah...it is individual's choice :)

Mads said...

@ Lancelot...hehe :P nice reply
yes we should start one :P

Mads said...

@ Anurag...hehe :P Yes I will =)

Mads said...

@ Nandita...hehe :P Yes yes lets sue them all :P

Mads said...

@ Spica...arre B.Sc in science mei horror kya hai :O
hehe...when we are successfull, they wont even remember the taunts :P \:D/

Mads said...

@ Pallav...hehe yeah :P let them be :D
congrats for the awards..
and thanks for the awards u gave me too :D
cheers :)

Mads said...

@ Rajat...i hv heard of that course :P
just ignore the irritating questions, aur kya? :'(

Mads said...

@ Shaunak..
arre commerce ke bacche X-( :P

X-( tumhe sue karu kya?

Mads said...

@ Disha...hehe..im more on the jealous side of engineers :P No slogging, and job...
par situation everywhere is on the terrible side now due to recession...
dentistry is seriously expensive :O u cant treat anyone for free lol...
naah wont sue u...ur too good to be sued :P :))

Mads said...

@ Chitwan.. lol tumhara mast hai :D white to black coat lol :D
thanks for liking the post :D
yeah relatives are super cool with me....other people are the problem :P whom i obviously don't care abt :D since they say, low for law :))

Mads said...

@ The Rat..That's soo bloody cool :D Leather technologist...!! So cool re :D
yeah :P just waitin for that damn degree :P

Mads said...

@ Sarath..millions nahi chahiye bhai :D only some lakhs will do :P
naah there is no provision like that....
coz freedom of expression and speech hai naa :'(

Mads said...

@ Amrita~Ams..ROFL :D :D :D :D pakka!!!!!!!!!! :D :D :D

Mads said...

@ Aditi..hehe thanks :D my sis suggested the title =)

Mads said...

@ i'll have to be jhoothi :D
mai tujhe jhoothi bulaungi aaj se :P :))
temme, amrita ji, how can i try to be truthful when i become a lawyer :(
arre new york next week only..wo bhi if i hv time..abhi internship hai..then college starts...and hope its good enough :D
wat abt u? :-w
arre vanilla sky ke questions irritating nahi hai...genuine doubts hai :D and she doesnt call me a loser by taking law naa :))

hehe thanks :D Easy to tolerate them coz i know, at least i can pronounce 'law' as 'law' and not 'low' like those uncles and aunties :P
relatives are super cool
and ROFL @ SOU =))) hehehe :P
arre... :D hum jab bade ho jayengi, i swear we wont trouble the next generation wale like this :P :D :D

Mads said...

@ Pallav..thanks for the awards :) :) :)

Mads said...

@ Enchantinganki..yeah!! :X :(

Mads said...

@ Vinnie :O
Your dad's a lawyer?
*salute him*
Yeah and u regularly visit our shit for tat too :D Mast comment leke :P
Arre law is mast. and you have someone in family too. You should have taken it naa :P (sounding like a old cranky grandma) :P
What are u studying now, waise?

Apparently intellectual said...

i totally second peter!
i think law ke laws padna sabki bus ki baat nahi!
so lawyers are sharper i guess!

I'll try 2 be truthful said...

arre main seriously comment ki tu mera mazak urati hai. chi mads.

aur tujhe truthful hone ki koi zaroorat nahi hai, thats not your pseudonym :P :P

maine bhi law padna tough bola !

:( :( i guess no new york for me.

Mads said...

@ i'll try to be truthful..yeah :D wanted to irritate u isliye likha :D so i teamed up with vanilla sky :D
hi five since u hate hugs :D u rock re :)
kyu no new york?
btw love aaj kal songs are too mast yaar. im obsessed with yeh dooriyan. do download the songs in case u havent heard :)
am actually looking forward to love aaj kal movie re :D deepika is looking cute and not really fake in it for a change =)
am hating kambhakht ishq ka sigh :X ugh!!

Shaunak said...

aye nautanki! Us commerce guys are the ones who get you to sue others.
Meri billi mujhe hi miaow? =P

Mujhe sue karegi toh I won't get the clients I'd planned for you..
:D

I'll try 2 be truthful said...

oh god!!! kambhakat ishq sucks! :x, other than being an incessant reminder of tashan, the songs are too bad!! :( :(

even you rock re:)

main ja rahi hu wo gaana download karne.

Vinnie said...

Mads
Dad's got ur salute in heaven! i graduated in statictics...:-)

vaise, i thought that was Peter's blog...anyways, u guys r a bunch of talented, young bloggers..keep it up!! cheers!

Arv said...

Hi Mads,

first time here...

I want to be a lawyer one day too :)

remember to sue them :P

take care... cheers...

sawan said...

Law is awesome. tell those relatives that lawyers make better money in corporate offices were engineers work hard day and night to earn half of wut they make.. respects!!

Stupidosaur said...

@Mad Lawyer (It isnt just prerogative of scientists,is it :P?)

Err, when I sue myself, will you fight my case?

No? You would have loved to? But conflict of interest? Thought so :P

By the way are those black cloaks you guys wear called law-suits?

Someone told me you guys 'file' lawsuits? Is it true? Why? Aren't there enough hangers to hang them?

;)

Jo career lena hai lo.
Bum Bhole.

@the dentist hounded by free loading relatives

Unki batteesi nikal de. Free of cost!

Chriz said...

lawyer or liar?

:P

Abhinav said...

sacchhi.. engineering was easy study-wise.. making reports 'honestly' created problems!

these kind of posts attracts me to blogging! sachhi main.. jhakkas!
you guests are quite interrogative!!

shruti said...

OMG!!.. these so- called-relatives are the 1st ones who just need a chance to bog u down like anything..the chance pe dance maro types..
dont know wat kinda pleasure they derive out of making senseless remarks..
zaroorat nahi hoti hai lekin free ki advice dene aa jate hai even wen they know we r least interested..
very "wah-wah" post :)

MultiMenon said...

Studying engg is like a stroll in the park wen compared to law.. hats off to u mADzzi.. :)
Relatives can be soo pissing sometimes.. :D as I was reading,was wondering what would have hpnd if this conversation was in tamil.. :p chinnava ena panraa??yappaaa...laaayeraaaa!!?? :p :D

Awesome translation..ur a genius..

I cant believe I almost missed this..am late.. :((

Masterpiece che.. :D

Take care

Nikhil

- Sugar Cube - said...

loll haha ;)
No matter what you choose to do..relatives & ppl around always say something not so encouraging.

Aninya said...

haha...super post!!
relatives are pretty much capable of crushing that lil bit of confidence that one has. screw them! Its never ending...even if u grow past this "college-ass-slogging" phase and are young and fabulous and minting mmoney in some corner of the world...they'll prolly still talk of how u r not married :P and if you are married...teh how you have married a complete douche :P
was back after long..enjoyed :D
have fun!

kunwar said...

Happened with me recently too, infact before reading your post, I was thinking about making a post about it..

And oye!!! Commerce aint stupid!

Mai bhi CA kar rha hun yaar :D

Randeep said...

Hehe I liked it.. especially ur explanations.. :)

oops my comment is short! :(

Cheers
Randeep

Priti R said...

akansha's friend.
Read your blog, made for a good read. Nice :) And yes, you make your IYER name in the law world! Hope everybody is lawyered :)

Reema Dash said...

Got into engineering but never wanted to... Seen every1 from my generation hating what they are doing but couldn't think much when they joined! Was easy to swim in the flow!!!
Bhubaneswar people think law is all about sitting in the ground floor of the Orissa High Court and making Affidavits for 100 buks! Engineering rocks coz dey get to sit in AC for 12 hrs ( No matter if at all they are ignorant about the work dey do! :P)
Happy to listen to my heart! n Go for law! :)
nice post!